It is only after a long break that one can aspire to get things done around here.
I was recently notified by a good friend of mine that somehow happened to have stumbled upon this blog that i should attempt to continue writting, because apparently I'm not too bad at it, so here i am, giving it my best, yet again, in hopes that i can achieve to write something that might be worthwhile to the eyes of the little to no readers i have left here, because i was an irresponsible twat and i moved on to different and less productive things since the last post i made in december.
In my absence, i ran into a cognitive stage of metamorphosis. I've reflected on what I've been trying to achieve in my free time, as in trying to untangle wires of my relatively unorganized mind in hopes of pulling out something that might be useful and productive. -- Obviously, it didn't work out.
Clearly, I've taken a large amount of wrong turns in the past few years, but I've attempted to make change, so I'm at least making it seem to myself that I'm going somewhere.
This leads to feelings and emotions. (Not like i have any because I'm clearly a fatalistic bastard) but a few months back i was sitting around in the library with a friend. Jesus. -- Not Christ. He pointed out something rather interesting while we were talking about sad and slightly traumatizing experiences that we've experienced, which we had to be assertive in order to get over, but lets not get into details.
Basically, he pointed out that he cried the night previous to the day we had the conversation. Me, being the jerk, i obviously poked fun about the situation, but the he said something that got to me, he stated that you shouldn't compress or hold onto your feelings, because you'll eventually burst into an emotional breakdown; Which is true, very true.
And then i realized, i had been doing exactly that, compressing all the bad experiences I've had in the past 5 years of my life without doing anything about it. I'm not going to cry about what's happened in the past, It's atrocious, because you can't rewrite what's happened, but it clearly shows how differently people react to certain situations and how we are able to overcome them and move on with our lives. Feels good i guess.
We've all got to put up with a lot of bullshit that get's thrown at us, and
we all have different ways of getting rid of stress, some cry, some get upset at others, and I, well i yell at people and inanimate object, like at my computer.
Pic is from last night after i missed an auction for some stax headphones i was going to buy, Clearly, i wasn't pleased, but the program certainly did the job at calming my tits. You can get it here if you want to try it.